Year End Survey

 1. What did you do in 2020 that you'd never done before?
I haven't been to the mall since March.  Made face mask.  Wore face mask every time we were in public. Finished 2 or 3 quilts.  Read 100 books.  Got a new kitchen

2. Did you keep your new years' resolutions, and will you make more for next year?
I don't think I made one.  I don't really plan on making any.  But I think I'll try to read another 100 books

3. Did anyone close to you give birth?
No. Not close-close.  My cousin. And people from instagram

4. Did anyone close to you die?
Not that I can recall

5. What countries did you visit?
 Hahahaha

6. What would you like to have in 2021 that you lacked in 2020?
Like, everything. Or anything.  Mostly seeing my mom and sister.  Plus so many other, smaller, things

7. What days from 2020 will remain etched upon your memory, and why?
I think it was March 13th.  That was the last day Bertram was in school

8. What was your biggest achievement of the year?
Doing more educational stuff with the kids

9. What was your biggest failure?
Letting my depression/quarantine make me lax about my health

10. Did you suffer illness or injury?
No.

11. What was the best thing you bought?
I wanna say the kittens, but they were free

12. Whose behavior merited celebration?
All of us.  We made it through spending all day, everyday together, for 3 months (That was full quarantine, then we widened our bubble  

13. Whose behavior made you appalled and depressed?
Anything to do with Trump/ line-toting republicans (A few of the outliers really earned my respect).
Anti-Maskers. Super-spreaders.  People ignoring the general health of themselves and others and having life as usual  

14. Where did most of your money go?
Rent.

15. What did you get really, really, really excited about?
Going to Disneyland (then unexcited when we couldn't go)

16. What song will always remind you of 2020?
Everything's Gonna Be Better Next Year by The Rescues

17. Compared to this time last year, are you:
i. happier or sadder? sadder 
ii. thinner or fatter? fatter, for sure
iii. richer or poorer? richer

18. What do you wish you'd done more of?
Exercised

19. What do you wish you'd done less of?
Being depressed, not that I had a ton of control over that

20. How did you spend Christmas?
The usual.  With the in-laws

22. Did you fall in love in 2020?
With kittens

23. How many one-night stands?
none, duh. I'm going to delete this for next year. Dumb question

24. What was your favorite TV program?
Probably Zoey's Infinite Playlist.  I watched a lot of cutthroat kitchen and tiny house shows

25. Do you hate anyone now that you didn't hate this time last year?
Anti-Maskers/ anti-science people.  Since they are actually dangerous, instead of just annoying

26. What was the best book you read?
Hmm, I like Factfulness, Finding Audrey, We need to talk about Kevin, Talking to Strangers, Unbroken, A man Called Ove, 

27. What was your greatest musical (re)discovery?
The Rescues

28. What did you want and get?
A safe/healthy year, a democrat in power

29. What did you want and not get?
pretty much everything else

30. What was your favorite film of this year?
I know I watched a few movies this year.  But nothing is springing to mind.

31. What did you do on your birthday, and how old were you?
I have no clue what we did... Likely, not much. I turned 37

32. What one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying?
No world-wide pandemic

33. How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2017?
Leggings

34. What kept you sane?
Anti-depressants

35. Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most?
I'm sure there was someone, but I can't think of anyone.

36. What political issue stirred you the most?
Covid, which shouldn't have been a political issue AT ALL.

37. Who did you miss?
My mom and seester

38. Who was the best new person you met?
No one, lol

39. Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2020:
Having a project helps things a lot

40. Quote a song lyric that sums up your year:
Everything's gonna be better next year.

Day 283

From early November, the completed kitchen

 I have no clue what was happening at the last entry, I should reread before posting, I suppose.

The cats are doing well.  Shy-Guy is my buddy, and loves snuggling.  (I have to keep removing him from the laptop).  Oona is still a loud purr-er, and sleeps with Bertram most nights.  

Bertram has had more good days than bad recently.  He is very unpredictable.  I think screentime is the basis for most of his bad behaviour.  We limit it to some extent, but it's pandemic  time, so there are only so many options for him.  He has chores he has to do (get newspaper, feed cat, make bed, wipe table, do a worksheet).  Most days the first 3 will get done.  For some reason, he really hates worksheets.  They are mostly for handwriting, because his is awful.  He just goes to fast.

He got student of the month at school.  He was so excited he ran all around the house.  The teacher said she can see that he is improving in paying attention, and not shouting out.  We've been trying, so I'm glad he is getting some recognition. 

Bron has had some evals.  She started speech a couple weeks ago.  And will be starting ABA sometime soon.  Everything is ready, but the scheduler hasn't called yet.  And it's the end of the year, so I'm not sure who is in the office anyway.  She has her school district evals at the end of January and beginning of February.

We took the rail off Bron's crib a week (or so) ago.  She was climbing out consistently, so it made sense to take the front off.  The first night was a little rough. Most night's now she'll play in the dark (she has a little nightlight in her bed) and then put herself to bed after a while. But she hasn't been coming out, so that is a win.  And she usually is quiet when she plays. 

I started working on a calico/tee shirt quilt for Bron.  It's twin size, for when we move her to the big bed. The squares are all cut, and I've started assembly on the top.

Aaron has continued to work from home.  Most of the time it's great, because I have a second set of hands most of the day, or as needed.  He took most of this week off, because why not?  We don't need to save the vacation time for anything.  Who knows when travel will be safe?  He helped his dad take a lemon tree from their neighbour's house.  The house between us and his folks has been sold to  developer. The same one that did Grandma Street's house.  Hers turned out fine, I guess.  It's giant.  And there are no windows facing the front (except one over the garage that always has the shade closed.) So it seems very foreboding and unfriendly.  I saw the wife once, walking a baby.  But she made no effort to look at me, or smile, and seemed to hurry  back into the house. 

This was the model/drawing.  I've marked the differences in how it actually looks.  There is no lower right window, that's all that stone wall.  There is no chimney.  That front gate (which goes to a patio), then the front door is a half gate, not full sized.  Those two upstairs windows don't exist.  I don't think the wall comes out that far.  And, you can kind of see, how huge it is compared to the houses beside it.

That is what, essentially, will be going in next door to us.  Thomas James builders have been redoing a lot of houses in the area, and most of their designs are similar to this, though, this is the least inviting.  With the exception of this and one other house, all the houses on the street are single story, and look small from the front.  Most have been added onto in the back, but generally fit the look.  I'm just grumping I guess.  I'm not thrilled about living by a construction site either.

Day 233 and kitchen

 (Blogging from my phone because I can't sleep)

Kitchen progression

Before: empty kitchen

Demo's kitchen

New recessed lighting

The paint colour

New flooring

Arrival of cabinets

Grey lower

White upper

Assembled (farmhouse sink!)

Quartz counters

Looking good

Fridge house

Horrible texturing job

I have been so happy with everything this far, until the texture guy came. My FiL arranged the guy, instead of the designer (problem 1). No one is sure what instructions FiL gave to the guy (problem 2), the FiL went camping and is incommunicado (problem 3). Hopefully, issues 2 and 3 can be solved today. Though, my MiL met with the guy, and I'm surprised she didn't find out the scope of his work before hand. Aaron, being an optimist, thinks it's not too bad. MiL doesn't like it, but could live with it. I hate it. I think it looks like popcorn ceiling, except everywhere.

The remodel has been moving along fairly quickly, which is good, because the whole thing is stressing me out. I don't like it when the house is messy, and I don't like it when things aren't where they go. Plus the stress from zoom schooling for Bert and his ABA, the election/general political situation, covid and quarantine, needing to get cavities filled, and the usual things, I feel like I have been living at a level of high anxiety for too long.

I can't remember what else I was going to talk about.

The kitchen

The before pictures. Don't mind the mess.  Some is from packing stuff up and some is typical mess.

Looking into the kitchen from the living room. Sort of a galley kitchen, but with cabinets only on one side. Floor with be replaced with wood-laminate planks in a grey-gold colour

Built-in corner desk.  To be replaced with a non built in large desk.  The shelves behind will be going away, but I think new shelves on the wall behind the computer are being added

Old stove.  There will be a new stove with a microwave hood added.

Icky tile is being replaced with white/light coloured quartz (I think) and a thin-grouted tile back splash.  

Cabinets are going to be replaced with new shaker cabinets in grey (on the bottom) and white or light grey on the uppers (I can't remember).

Ginormous grout.  Why was this ever popular?  (The counters at my dad's house are similar, but with thinner, white grout).

There will be cabinets added on the other side of the fridge for a built in pantry.  We'll also be getting a farmhouse sink.

That cabinet will be going away, replaced with a built-in

The rolling cart the microwave will be going away, and a low counter will be put there, mostly as prep space or baking space.  It will butt up to the non-built-in (built-out?) desk.

I'm not sure what colour the walls will be yet.  Maybe white, or very pale grey.  They are "yellow" currently.  But it's such a pale yellow it's more off-white.

 If I can get the mock-up from my MiL I'll post the pictures of that too.

New kitchen

 Surprisingly, we're getting a new kitchen. Cabinets, counter, desk, microwave and stove, lights and flooring. Our dishwasher and fridge are newer, so they stay. 

Our kitchen is in the neighbourhood of 50 years old. Dark wood cabinets, whitish-yellowish tile counters with HUGE grout lines, and lights that look like they're from an office (those long fluorescent ones in a body case).

We originally mentioned to the landlords/Aaron's parents we were thinking of painting the cabinets, and maybe trying to find an overlay for the terrible counter. Then they start talking about real upgrades. I sort of blew it off, because they'd talked about it before, and nothing happened. But, lo and behold, contractors came, money was paid (not by us), and a date is set. We have to have everything out of it by Saturday. We've started, but it is a much more daunting task than I realized.

The current plan is to move the fridge and microwave into the living room, and make a small make shift kitchen in there. We have the garage for storage, but the main way in is through the kitchen; which might be difficult based on the stage of the remodel. 

It's giving me a lot of anxiety. And Bertram is dead set against it, because change.

I was going to add pictures, but I'm typing from my phone, and they option  doesn't see to be there. 🤷🏻‍♀️

Day 198 or Misadventures in flu shots

 On Labour Day, we drove to get flu shots from the drive thru flu clinic at Kaiser. But it was closed.  Aaron can't get a flu shot yet, as he is in a Covid study. Today (because Bertram is on Fall break) the two kids  and I went to get flu shots this morning.  They were both unhappy, of course.  Bert more so, Bron just whined "I don't want a shot".  So we drove down, and got in the very long line that looped back and forth in the parking lot.  After about 20 minutes, I needed to pee.  At 30 minutes I was feeling desperate.  I was lamenting this to my sister, and she suggested using a diaper.  I thought that might work.  So, I clandestinely arranged the diaper in my pants (while in the car, in the line), but I couldn't do it.  Have to ever tried to wet your pants?  As much as I had to go, I couldn't.  Then, around the 40 minute mark (we were probably still 15-20 minutes away from getting shots) Bertram declared that he needed to pee, real bad, and couldn't wait.  I offered him the diaper, but he refused (as I assumed her would).  So when we could reach an exit (as we were trapped in the middle of parking lot rows most of the time), I drove out.  I wanted to cry, but I didn't.  It was very frustrating to wait that long with nothing to show. We drove across the street and used Rite-Aid's bathroom.   (And then bought something, because it's the right thing to do).

Day 192

 Bertram had an IEP addendum meeting a couple weeks ago.  He can now "leave" school at 11:45, which helps some.  I think if I had realized in the summer how this was all going to pan out, I probably would have looked seriously into home-schooling or independent study.  Like all kids, especially ASD kids, it's hard.  It's far from optimal.  And since he has ABA (or speech) after school he's just go, go, go.  We may still change ABA to a shorter schedule.   Yesterday he had a great day "at" school, and he did the best he's done in a really long time with ABA, and he did his short day.  I don't want him skipping social studies/science everyday, but if that improves his behaviour that much it may be worth it.  The district has been perhaps hinting about changing up the day with less online instruction, but nothing has come, as of yet.

Bronwyn had the first half of her ASD assessment on Monday.  Nothing to report as of yet, not until we complete the second half in a couple weeks.  She's still reading a lot.  I have a running shirt with a turtle that says "Slow AF".  I asked her to read it, which she read as slow af (the af sound).  I was surprised that she did the phonic

Aaron got into a covid vaccine study, and got his first shot last week.  I think since his arm wasn't sore he  got the placebo,  but we'll find out at some point in the future.  

I've been working on my giant t-shirt quilt.  I have all the large panel's done, and I've started working on the sashing to even out the sides.  My yard project it currently at homeostasis.  It looks great, and there isn't a ton more work, except watering, and occasionally adding a few more seeds.  The actual quilting will be a large undertaking; due to the size and heft of the thing, most of it will have to be hand quilted.  I'm not sure why I quilt.  I don't particularly enjoy it.  I just enjoy the end result... which I guess is enough?

Day 171

 So. Many. Days.

If Covid isolation were a pregnancy, it would be 24 weeks along.  🙈

Last week, we broke out to Half Moon Bay for a little bit.  We would normally go to Santa Cruz, but the fires were still bad over there.

It was cold there.  Or rather, typical of a Northern California beach.  (Air and water temp both 58ish).

Family selfies

Bertram instantly made a friend with a 7 year old named Zoey.

I have no idea why this picture is so grainy.

We took the long way back home, up 1 towards San Francisco, then back down 101.  It was a nice day.

I signed Aaron, Bertram and myself up for two 5k's, because we need something to do.  One is a pumpkin/Halloween "race", the other is a Turkey Trot.  They are both virtual, so we actually made a team with my mom and sister for the Turkey Trot.   ;/'  

Day 162

 School started a week and a half ago.  It's gone... ok.  There is a lot of waiting around, for other kids to finish.  And writing is still challenging.  (Not like letters, like sentences.)  I have inquired to his IEP head about independent study.  As it seems like that may be a better fit for not being in the classroom.  But we'll see.  He has had some breakdowns, and anger fits, which I suppose it's abnormal, but doing it on camera (thankfully muted) is not great.

The state is on fire.  There was a dry lightning storm last Sunday.  It sparked wild fires all over the state.  Close to us is the CZU lightning complex fire (Santa Cruz Mountains highway 9 all the way down to hwy 1.  Ben Lomond, and Bonny Dune, as well as Big Basin state park are gone), The SCU Lightning complex fire, (This one is the closest to us: Behind and around lick observatory/Mt Hamilton, stretching up to the outskirts of Milpitas and Fremont, and East down the other side of the mountain.)  There is one down past Gilroy, and another up near Napa.  Plus further north, and down to just south of LA.  So it's not hyperbole to say the state is on fire.  We have started putting together an emergency tote, I don't anticipate needed it for this particular disaster, but it's good to be ready.  Also, my "favourite" is that trump said it's because we didn't rake the forests enough.  FFS.

Between the fires, heatwave and Covid, we have been stuck inside a lot.  We're watching a good amount of movies.  I've gotten a little outside time, but not enough.  I'm going a little more crazy than usual.

The Buspar didn't last long, I got headaches a lot.  I just started Abilify, hopefully it will be a good match.

Kitties are doing well.  They have free run of the house, although, they are door darters.  But they run all around, which is cute.  They are about twice as big as when we got them (Weight wise, but probably close on height/length).  Oona is a loud purr-er.  Shy Guy is not too shy.

I don't think there is too much else to talk about.  As nothing is really happening.  

Day 135

We moved into the next phase of reopening for a whopping 2 days before everything closed again.  Not sure why the powers that be thought reopening as the numbers rose would be a good idea.  So things are continuing in the same direction.  Numbers keep going up.

School is going to be completely online through (at least) 2 August.  They are expected to be available/on the computer (?) from 8-2.  I was hoping it would be a little more open form like the end of last year.  I'm not sure how it will go, I guess it's supposed to be a mix of online class, individual teacher time, and possibly small groups (online).  (Though there has been some talk about doing small pods in addition to this, but we'll see how it all shakes out).  So, due to this new schedule we needed to change Bertram's time and day for speech.  And his time for ABA will change, and he will likely have to get a new tech, which sucks.  But to keep the same one we'd have to do 5:30-8:30, which is too late (as bedtime is 8).  But maybe the school schedule won't be so rigid, but it's all in flux.  We don't have his class assignment yet, and thus haven't heard from the teacher about her plan.  It's all stressing me out.  And I know this is going to be difficult for Bertram too. 

I stopped taking Remeron. It wasn't helping, and it made me hungry all the time.  I will be trying BuSpar. We'll see how that goes.  I kind of feel like I want to switch the Wellbutrin+Zoloft combo, but the shrink seems to be hesitant to do that.  I feel like I'm in a bad head space.  Like having a base level of anxiety all the time.  Plus, I feel like I'm failing at everything.  And I'm just on edge all the time. 

We adopted two kittens that we abandoned, and malnourished.  (Aaron's cousin's neighbour found them under her deck).  Originally I just wanted the girl, since we've had issues with boy cats spraying.  But they were bonded, so we took them both.  They were born at the beginning of June, so they're about 8 weeks old.  Bertram named the boy Shy-Guy (which is a character in Mario), and Aaron and I named the girl Oona.

Oona

Shy-Guy

They're been confined to our bedroom and bathroom.  They are super friendly and very playful.

Our washer died today, which a barrel full of water and wet clothes.  It was 14 years old. Fortunately, we're in a position that replacing it wasn't a huge burden.  Really more of an annoyance than anything.  But we got a nice LG washer.

We've (Aaron, Bertram and I) have been learning to play pokemon cards.  It's pretty fun.  Bertram keeps trying to cheat, which is weird because he doesn't actually care about winning.

Bronwyn's birthday was a couple weeks ago.  My baby is 3.  We didn't do much for her in terms of a party.  I made a cake, and we gathered on grandma and grandpa's lawn.