And now for something slightly different

A few interesting things lately:

The women had a 2-hour meeting about pornography at church on Sunday.  I was honestly expecting to leave shortly after it started, since it's a waste of time.  Surprisingly, I stayed for the whole presentation.  Nothing new there.  And I was a little disappointed that human trafficking wasn't mentioned.  I got nothing out of it, in terms of its actual aims.  However, I did get something out of it.  There was part where a plan of action was mentioned.  (The plan of action to end porn addiction was something like going to 12-step meetings, seeing a counselor, setting boundaries etc).  I realized I could use the plan of action as a base for myself with depression.  (Since, like addiction, depression also changes the pathways and thought processes).  So I made a plan of action for myself.  It includes: daily prayer (something I'm not too good at), asking for help when I need it (something else I'm not good at), seeking opportunities to serve/ do good/ help others, keep taking my meds and seeing my counselor and shrink, exercise on a near daily basis, and concentrate on now.

I got a very kind note/letter from a complete stranger.  I posted a comment on my friend's facebook (she posted an article about infertility).  This woman, who I'm guessing is a relative of my friend, wrote me a very long message.  About her experiences with infertility, and how she overcame her struggles/depression surrounding it.  It was really nice, and very useful.

I've been catching up on my scripture reading.  At the beginning of the year, I found a plan online to read all the LDS standard works in a year (The Old and New Testament, The Book of Mormon, The Doctrine and Covenants, and the Pearl of Great Price), roughly 2000 pages of scripture.  For about 2 months I was right on track.  Then I fell over a month behind.  When I started up again, I wasn't sure I'd be able to catch up, since I was at least 150 pages behind.  But, due to some long reading sessions, and diligence, I'm almost caught up.  It's April 30th, and I'm on April 24th for the Bible and April 17th for the Book of Mormon.  So I'm getting closer.  I'm hoping to be completely caught up by the end of the week.  And then stay of track (of course).

On Sunday I met with my bishop.  I needed to talk to him about my disdain for ladies Sunday school, and the fee for my counseling.  Since the counseling is done through some arm of the church, there is assistance in paying for it, if you can't afford it.  When I talked to him originally, the fee was $90.  I said I thought I could pay $50 a session.  Then I realized I'd be going weekly, and wasn't sure I could afford the fees.  So I talked to him, and he said my father-in-law offered to pay for it.  :Quelle surprise!:  He knows we're having money issues (as in we're running out, quickly), but we didn't ask for him to pay it.  I'd really only mentioned it in passing.  So that was a nice surprise.  I didn't get much help on my ladies Sunday school issue.  But I didn't expect too much advice on that.

The bit of bad news is that I'm still flaring up with the Crohns.  So Humira is likely in my future.

I'm actually feeling a little hopeful.  Which hasn't happened in quite a while.

More of the same...

Aaron has some job prospects.  He has his 2nd, and 3rd interviews with the Boy Scouts next week.  It's down to him and one other guy.  He has a test with the county sheriff's department on Saturday.  Plus a few other things he's been looking into.  He won't be taking the BAR, at least for a few years.
Here's why: After law school, he'd sign up for a BAR prep course.  This costs somewhere in the neighbourhood of $5000 (which we do not have), so we'd have to get a private loan for that.  The BAR prep is essentially a full time job (and then some), which means no working, which means more loans. Then after he takes the BAR, he'd work in an unpaid internship until the results come back, in November.  Then, he can finally start applying for paying jobs, but would still need to do the unpaid internship until he got a job.  So it would be at least 8 months, likely longer, with no job.  So it's a no go.  But maybe in a few years, when the type of legal job he wants is more available.

My Crohns is flaring up again.  It's making me grouchy.  And it's painful, of course.  And, it likely means I'll have to switch to Humira or Remicade soon.

We're starting to get our adoption stuff together.  Basically, as soon as Aaron is employed we're going to turn in the papers.  I had a form for my GI to fill out.  He'll basically write that I can't get pregnant, due to my Crohns, and then we'll be in review.  And a long process will begin.

Speaking of babies, we were just made God-Parents of Aaron's cousin's son.  Woot.  So we'll go to his baptism next month.

I got Aaron a new Timbuk2 bag for graduation.  When we found out he was going to law school, and would be commuting so much we decided to get him a Timbuk2 bag.  (They're usually used by cyclists and bike messengers, and are nearly indestructible, and thus, are kind of pricey).  We were at the BYU sports shop and saw some Timbuk2 bags on sale (for $75).  We got him a nice eggplant one (purple is his favourite colour).  I found a nice one of clearance at the Timbuk2 website for $79, and it's grey and purple.  He loved it.  :-)

More of the same

• I started seeing my new shrink, Marjan, this week.  She's from LDS family services.  I'll be seeing her once a week for a while.  Hopefully that will be helpful.  
• My guts have started to hurt again.  Do not like.
• I've still been sad.
• I thought I had more to say.  I guess I don't.

The weekly update

The natural eating went pretty well.  I think I'm going to try to continue.  It just takes a lot of planning.  And a lot of reading: looking for recipes, checking out ingredients, some nutritional-type research, etc.  I did it Monday-Friday evening.  On Friday we had a work outing, so yeah.  Then today I didn't eat clean.  I just needed a break.  That sounds stupid, oh well.   I think if I continue it, I'll need to do some cooking on the weekend, make ahead meals and freezer meals.  But I don't have the energy today.

 Plus I'm teaching in Relief Society tomorrow.  A stupid, jokey comment was made about a homeless member last week, it really rubbed me the wrong way.  I'm not really sure what to do though.  I should have just said something right then, instead of being silent.

I finally got a call from the LDS counseling services.  And I have an appointment on Wednesday.  So we'll see how that goes.  It's $50 a visit, which leads into the next topic...

Money, and how we have none.  We're already a month behind in rent.  And Aaron told his folks that we'll be unable to pay until he has a job (it's nice to have family as landlords).  I did the math yesterday, and even if we had (and kept) a very tight budget we're still about $150 short of what we need each month with what I earn.  Our "savings" (if you can call them that) are dwindling quickly.  But Aaron has some good job things on the horizon, and he may be able to work some jobs with his dad.  It's just scary.  And certainly doesn't help with depression and anxiety.  

more of the same

That's how it goes, I guess.  Just the lows.  I've been reading a lot.

The weather was nice today, so I line-dried most of the clothes.  I like being able to do that.

I'm doing a "natural" diet next week.  No preservatives, no high fructose corn syrup, no added sugar, no ingredients where I don't know what they are.  (Which is really annoying, because Xanthan Gum is in everything, and I only sort of know what it is...).  I bought lots of good food though: plain yogurt, eggplant, mango, oranges, bananas, pears, kiwis, quinoa, fresh salsa, tofu, 7-grain hot cereal, etc.  So I'll be eating things like beans and rice with salsa, omlettes with spinach and mushroom, soup, large salads (with olive oil, vinegar and lemon), bread with peanut butter (I got the all natural kind, you have to stir, yuck) and granny apple slices, etc.

My allergies have been terrible.  I really need to get some Zyrtec-D.  Sudefed and Benedryl aren't cutting it anymore.

I did these drawing in conte crayons during conference.  I think the one of Yoie is better, but not too bad.  Especially considering I haven't done this stuff in... 6+ years.