Bertram's Awful, No Good, Horrible, Very Bad Day.

It started at 4am.  He started to cry.  I let him go for a while, but he didn't go back to sleep.  I looked closer at the monitor, and could see he was soaked.  Aaron and I went in, and he was super wet from chest to toe, and his bed (and favourite toy, Charlie Bear) were soaked as well.  We changed everything out, and he went back to sleep fairly quickly.  He woke up next around 8, and was not too unhappy, but was very poopy.  I got him cleaned up, fed, and then we went out the door to the DMV.  (I told him it was almost time to go, and he dragged my purse over to me, and said "go!").

We were at the DMV for about 50 minutes, fairly short, by DMV standards, but fairly long by 18 month-old standards.  He lost his patience pretty quickly, and kept saying "go" and "slide".  I kept reassuring him, not that it helped.  He was really starting to melt towards the end.

We got in the car, and headed to Willow Street Park.  He was really excited when we got there.  He played on the different things, and then he wanted to swing.  So I pushed him.  (And practically gave him whiplash by stopping the swing to keep him from crashing into a wayward kid(way to go attentive parents)). And he swung for 10-15 minutes, and wanted to keep swinging, but I was getting dizzy from watching him.  So I told him we had to let other kids have a turn (it's true, all the swings were being used).  And when I got him out, he want into full tantrum mode, and threw himself to the ground.  (Scraping his forehead in the process).  He calmed down and bit, and climbed up the equipment.  Wayward kid (probably about 1 year old) and his mom were on there too.  And like a flash Wayward kid had a fistful of Bertie's hair.  I pinned Bertie down, and Wayward kid's mom worked on loosening his kung-fu grip.  By that time, Bertie was in full hysterics and it was time to go.  He'd calm down, then make a pulling his hair motion and start crying all over again.  (That continued the whole way home).

I changed him, and laid him down, He didn't sleep, he'd wet through again.  I changed him, and laid him down again, and he finally slept.  (And so did I).

He was unhappy when he woke up.  Still upset about the hair pulling incident (continuing the hair pulling motion, and pouting), and he was trying to tell me something I wasn't understanding, which upset him further, compounded by the fact that I was offering him yogurt that he didn't want.  Eventually, he was composed, and we went to the grocery store.  Once we were there, he decided he was staving.  I got him some Hawaiian rolls, and he was fairly happy.

When we got home, he was good for a bit.  He demanded to go again, so he and I walked around the block.  He was fairly happy with that and once daddy came home.

His last canine tooth is coming in, so that doesn't help things.  But he was ok in the evening, and went to sleep fairly quickly.

Exercise
My sister and I started a new work out today: Bikini Body Mommy 6 week mini-challenge.  Six days a week, 20-30 minutes at a time, consisting of upper body, lower body and cardio. Today was day one, and I wanted to get off on the right foot.  So I got up at 5:45 so I could jog (once it's cold I can go during the day, but it's kind of nice to get up and get it done).  I jog/walked for 30ish minutes, then came home and did the upper body work out.  As I was about to get in the shower Bertie woke up (a little after 7).  And after he'd had milk, he walked over to the door and said "go!"  I figured since it was going to be super hot again today, we may as well go.  And we were out of milk, so I figured we could walk to the store after the park.  I loaded up the stroller and we headed out.  The whole way there, Bertram said "slide, slide".  We played for a while, walked to Grocery Outlet, and then walked home.  I hit 10,000 steps just before 9 am.
I'm going to aim to jog 3-4 days a week.

Nursing
We are officially done with nursing.  I felt bad, because I cut it off.  And the first couple days when Bertie was upset, he would cry "boobie, boobie" and pull on my shirt.  But now he's ok.  I have mixed feelings.  I'm glad to be done, but at the same time I miss it.

Adderall
Now that nursing is done, Adderall is back!  My shrink actually wanted me back on it sooner, but knew that nursing was important to me.  I really forgot how wonderful Adderall is, and I can see why people abuse it.  But I really feel more focused, and more importantly, awake!  I'm hoping that the combination of exercise, completing breastfeeding, and adding Adderall will help me lose some weight, because I'm tired of being chunky.

Heat
It has been so hot lately!  It was 97 today!  And it's been hot for most of the previous week.  I'm really looking forward to fall.  Sweaters, crisp air, maybe some rain?

Baby
We were trying for baby #2.  My sister is getting married next year.  Originally it was in Oct, or Nov, so I figured we could try through October, then stop if not pregnant, and start again in Spring.  (I either need to be in early to mid pregnancy, or with a new baby.  I can't travel while hugely pregnant).  But the wedding got moved up to June.  So I went back on the pill, and we'll start up again late January.  (So I have a little over 4 months to lose weight!)

Bits about today
Today was pretty good.  My MiL watched Bertie so I could shower after our walk. He took a really early nap (and was asleep before 10:30).  After he napped we met dad at Olive Garden for lunch.  I tried to have him nap again after lunch, but he didn't.  I got a letter with no return address.  In it was a $60 gift certificate to a nail salon nearby.  I have no idea who sent it, but it was a great surprise!  We had dinner with Aaron's folks.  I got the house tidied up, swept, did (and put away) laundry, dishes, etc.  So we're in good shape for tomorrow.  I have a dentist appointment at 10:40, for a cleaning.

Catch up

Bertie had a grumpy day.  It happens every now and then.  But he did mostly ok.  He took a short nap.  We went to the grocery store.  On the way there, we pass a park, at which he shouted "Slide! Slide!"  Slide and ball are his favourite words lately.

Other Bertram things: He loves going in the backyard at his grandma and grandpa's house.  Mostly because there are tomato plants, and he'll snatch them off the vine and eat them (even the green ones).  He's been learning a lot of words.  I asked him to say his name, but it just sounds like Burbur.  He likes playing in the car.  He's been asking for Nana since she left.  He looks in her room.  And when I get my phone, he'll point at it and say "Nana", then I show him her picture.  He also recognizes Aaron's ringtone.

We're now weaning in earnest.  I resented Aaron for saying it was time.  (I thought it was pretty cute that Bertie would say "boobie", but I guess Aaron didn't).  But it is time, and I'm ready to be done.  But I'll miss it.  There is an indescribable closeness that comes with it.  It was hard today, because he was having a rough time, and saying "Boobie, boobie".  He was pretty easily distracted, but I felt awful doing it.

But since, I'm doing that, I can start taking Ritalin again.

I haven't been feeling confident about my look lately.  My skin is bad, I can't make my hair look good, I'm over-weight and not digging my double chin.  I'm working on exercising more and eating better.  But, of course, nothing happens overnight.  And Bertie broke our scale, so I can't really keep track very well.

I'm going to buy my plane tickets for Virginia soon.  Bertram and I will go in early November.

Another quick post

• Bertie was a terror the last few days.  LOTS of tantrums.  I couldn't guess what would set him off.  But today was SO much better.  He was back to his usual happy self,  Not sure if it was teeth, or what, but hopefully things will stay happy.
• My sister and I finished the 30 day yoga challenge last Friday.  Now were working our way through the Bikini Body Mommy Challenges.
• I miss my mom,  It was so fun when she was here.  Plus having an extra set of hands is great.  Also, Bertie is still walking around saying "Nana?"  It makes me sad.  But we'll go out there in November.
• Bertie has been adding a lot of words to his vocabulary lately: more, please, candy (not sure how he learned that), duck, roar, Zelda, hat, car, and yogurt.
• Today, I decided I'd only eat when I was hungry.  I ended up only eating 1700 calories.  I guess I should always do that.  :P 

Quick

A quick post, because, Holy Moly!  It's been almost a month.  (BTW, Rebecca, you never blog anymore).

Bertie is a lot of fun lately.  I'm really enjoying being a stay at home mommy.  He is funny.  And I love watching him learn.

My sister and I have been doing a youtube 30 days of yoga challenge.  We're almost halfway through, and we're both really liking it.

Speaking of my sister: she's getting married!  No date yet, but sometime next fall.

My mom is coming in tonight!

The end!

Stoke. Angioplasty. Party.

Stroke.
16 July 2015, in the evening.  Grandma (Aaron's grandma) was at home, and suddenly got very dizzy.  So much so that she couldn't stand, or walk, and started throwing up.  We (all the family) were concerned, but assumed it was an inner ear issue (Aaron thought it might be the flu).
I went to work Friday morning, and got a call from Sophie (Aaron's cousin) that the ambulance had come and taken Grandma to Good Sam.  Janet (my MiL) was watching Bertie (as she does whenever I go to work), but left him with my FiL.  Not knowing what was going on, or if things were dire, I left work and went to the ER.  Aaron met me there, and Sophie met us as well, with Bertie in tow.  Bertie was tired, so after a bit, I took him home.  Aaron stayed all day, except to come home and pick up lunch.  Through a CT scan and MRI, they were able to see that she'd had a stroke (a clot).  It was small and in the back, center of her head.  (None of us knew that severe and sudden dizziness was a sign of a stroke.  It's not on mentioned in FAST).  She was admitted and treatment began.  She was still funny though.  She said "See?  And you thought it was all in my head.  And you were right!"  She was really thirsty but was NPO until she could be evaluated for swallowing (which anyone could tell wasn't an issue).  But day 3 she was doing much better.  She was eating like normal, walking around, and back to her old self.
On Wednesday she was moved to the Mission Oaks Good Sam campus for rehab.  This is a better set up than the hospital.  Much quieter, no shared rooms, better sleep, and no age restrictions on visitors.  (So Bertram and the other great-grand kids can visit.  The hospital is 13+ only).  She does three therapy sessions a day OT, PT, and sometimes ST.  She's doing really well.  If I didn't know she'd had a stroke, I'd never have guessed.  Which is amazing and a huge blessing.  We need our 91 year old matriarch.  She's slated to come home on Tuesday.

Angioplasty.
22 July 2015, early in the morning.  My dad went into Good Sam to have his 2nd angioplasty procedure.  After his heart attack, he had one.  At that time they were only able to clear one artery and left the "widow maker" blocked.  (I should mention that my dad is the type that should not have a heart attack.  He's always treated his body well, maintained a healthy weight, and before Crohns was an issue; he was, in general, in good health).  A few weeks back, his cardiologist, Dr Kao, suggested they try a second angioplasty to see if the blockage could be removed.  The previous procedure used a vein in the wrist, this one would be done in the groin (femoral artery).  I was nervous, because I know the femoral artery is more risky, and it is messing with the heart.  I took the day off work, and picked him up at 5.45am.  They took him back fairly soon, and told me it would be a couple hours.  I sat in the waiting room for a while, and then went to a walk.  I checked in after a couple hours, they said it was going fine, but they'd started a little late.  I waited, worked on my crossword puzzles.  A little after 3 hours, I checked again.  They said everything was fine, it was just taking longer than usual.  I was starting to get very anxious at that point.  I think around 3.5 hours the nurse came and said he was in recovery, everything went well, and Dr Kao would be out to talk to me soon.  He told me everything went well.  They tried to go after the clot the back way, but were unable, and had to back out, and go the front way.  Because of this, they had to open the femoral artery in the left and right legs.  There were actually two clots (blocked 99%), but he was able to clear both, and put in 2 stents in one blockage, and one in the other.  He checked the original stent, which was still doing its job.  His heart should be good to go for a while. He was feeling ok after the procedure, except he couldn't pee.  So he ended up needing to be catheterized.  He stayed in the hospital for 24 hours after the procedure and then I drove him home.  He has a follow up with Dr Kao later this week.

Party.
26 July 2015, today.  Sophie threw Janet a tea party for her 70th birthday.  I was kind of surprised she went ahead with the party (due to grandma's stroke), but the show must go on.  I went over yesterday to help with set up a little, mainly I watched Sophie's two little ones (and Bertie) while she and her hubby picked up tables.  I made cucumber tea sandwiches, and sugar cookies.

Everything was beautiful.  The food was good, people had fun.  Well, except Bertie.  He was really tired, and refused to nap in someone else's crib.  We left before a lot of the guests, though not appreciably early.  Baby fell asleep after 4 minutes in the car.

Dreams

Two nights ago, I dreamed of the farm.  It was the last day there, the last morning there.  The sun hadn't yet risen, and the house was mostly empty.  There was an empty china hutch in the dining room, and one chair in the kitchen (Nanny was sitting there).  And there was a small candy rack (like in a grocery store), with three boxes of candy (like Hot Tamales, and Mike and Ikes); one for me and one for each of my sisters.  And there was some money taped to each box.  A gift from my departed grandpa.

Last night I dreamed of the farm.  Nanny had hired a lawn-mowing airplane.  And it would come really close to the house (scarily close).

Wednesday I over slept.  Bertie woke up a lot that night.  And I hit the snooze too many times, and woke up at 6.  I usually leave at 6, so I did a lot of running around.  But Bertie took a good nap, so I got to nap too.

And last night Bertram slept all night!  It's been months since that happen.  He slept 8p-8a!  Woo hoo!  He was just a wonderful happy boy today.  Like the kind of perfect mommy day.  He played, we ran errands, I got stuff done, and made dinner.  And we had a nice day.

I found out my dad is going to have another angiogram on Wednesday.  I'm very nervous.  They'll be going through the groin this time, and taking a round-about way to get to the blockage.