June post

 The kids finished school two weeks ago.  Bron made good progress.  And Bert got all 3s (the highest) except on the spacing for his writing. In-person school went well for both kids.  Bert had one so-so day and one bad day, but all the rest were good.  Bron had good days across the board.
He had his first non-cousin playdate the Saturday after school finished.  Seems like he did pretty well.  I don't know if playdates are hard for all ASD kids.  I was relieved that it went well.  He's having a friend (the same friend) over here presently.  It's going ok.  He seems to forget that he needs to pay attention to his guest too.  I guess maybe it takes practice.

Bron started Summer school today, half-days 9-12.  I tried to sign Bertram up, but I only wanted half-days for him (partially because it's Summer, he doesn't need to be in school from 9-3.  And partially because he has ABA daily at 3).  Half-day programs all filled up, so full day was the only option, so we are skipping summer school.  I found a gymnastics camp for Bertram.  It's also from 9-12, which isn't the best in terms of timing, but since Aaron is working from home, most days are not an issue.  Tomorrow Aaron has a lunch meeting, so my MiL is going to pick up Bertram, and I'll get Bron.  Bron seemed to have a good first day.  Bertram just complained a lot, it was hot, he ran out of water, he didn't like it.  He has another 4 days.  If he changes his mind, I'll sign him up for another week later in the summer.  Otherwise, I'll have to see what else I can find.  All the Parks and Rec swimming lessons filled up, so I need to look into some private ones.  For Bertram anyway.  Since Bron has school from 9-12 and ABA from 3-7 she doesn't have a lot of time for other activities, but I don't want to spread her too thin.

Bron going to Summer school

A week ago, I got a tattoo.  (Sorry mom, feel free to skip this paragraph).  I've been wanting one since I was 14 or 15, and since I turned 38, I figured it was time to take the plunge.  I got three flowers on my upper arm for my sisters and me.  (Sunflower for Rebecca, hibiscus for Jessica and a California poppy for me.  And I included 2 bees on my poppy for the kids(because the kids names start with B)).  I got the outline a week ago, I got back in two weeks for colour.  I didn't hurt too badly, manageable, mostly.  A couple spots were more sensitive, but I didn't need any breaks, so I kind of felt like a badass.  Haha.

An odd angle but you get the idea, I'll post another when the colour is done

We went to the aquarium for the first time since February 2020.  Normally we go every 2 or 3 months.  Bronwyn was really excited by everything.  Bertram was sad because his favourite exhibit was gone.  But it was a good day.  We got lunch at Carl's Jr and played at the park before headed back.  We stopped at Sonic on the way home (Our closest Sonic is 30 minutes away, so we don't go often).  

I've been exercising most mornings.  Like real exercise, hard cardio and weights, usually for 45 minutes, sometimes more.  I've been doing this for about three weeks, and so far I've gained 2 lbs.  :eye roll: I have an appointment with my GP for a physical next week for a physical, so i'm going to talk to her about it then. 

Back at it

 The kids started in person school yesterday.  It was a relief.  I walked Bertram to school, just like in the old days.  Then Aaron and I drove Bron to preschool.  There are only 3 kids in her class, the other three or four are online. She walked in without hesitation.  Aaron teared up a little at dropping her off.  Aside from church nursery, this is her first time on her own. She did well her first day.  She kept her mask on, which was a surprise to me.  Bertie had a decent first day with one little bump in the middle.

Today (the second day) Bron ran to preschool, and had a good day.  Bertie did not have a good day.  He started out ok, but got frustrated in math.  Then started yelling and crying.  So we went to hang out with the principal.  She called me. That makes me worried.  I don't want him to have to change schools.  I also don't want him to hate school.  I know there is going to be an adjustment period.  He's been home for a year.  But it's still disappointing.  And it makes me feel like a crappy parent.  He told me on the way home that he felt a little homesick at school.  I told him it'll get easier as time goes on.  I hope that is true.  

Just the usual

 Things have been moving along.  We hit a year in quarantine.  But things are looser than they were, so I stopped my counting of the days.  

Bron started virtual preschool last week, with the assumption she will switch to in person on April 21.  Just 25 more school days.  I am ready for Bert to go back, and preschool will be much more useful for Bron in person.  Though, she's doing fairly well virtually.  It's a little rough because someone has to sit with Bron during her sessions (they do like 15 minute chunks then have breaks), and someone needs to be available to Bert during class as well.  Aaron's day is flexible, so he's been with Bron about half the time.

The 100th day of preschool, her 3rd or 4th day

The other thing that has been in the works is updating the hall bath.  It's our only 4 piece bath (the master is 3, and I never shower in there).  Fortunately the vanity, sink and toilet are in good shape.  So we're doing new: medicine cabinet, light fixture, towel bars, shower rod and curtain, and adding a cabinet above the toilet, and painting.  I say we, but Aaron is doing all the work, I'm the director. 

wood towel bar, and shower curtain and rod

vanity and light

Other wood towel bar

After and before of the medicine cabinet (the blue to the left of the new cabinet is the new wall colour)

That's all I can think of for now.  Please ignore all typos, Bron got me up at 5:30 and the coffee is just kicking in now.

Mid December

Training has been going ok.  Wednesday was a longer running section.  I'd been doing 2 minutes of running, followed by 2 minutes of walking, repeated for 30ish minutes.  Sometimes that was ok, sometimes it was a struggle.  Wednesday was 3 run, 2 walk.  I was dreading it, but it went really well, and I didn't wish I was dead.  I've kept up with workouts with week.  And I ever threw in an extra one after running on Wednesday.  I've been wanting to do more leg/butt strengthening training, but I didn't want to be sore for running.  I figured Wednesday to Saturday would be enough recovery, which it was.  So I may have start including that, when the kids will let me.  I haven't done my 4 mile run yet (it's 2/2).  I didn't sleep great, and was exhausted when the alarm went off.  But I should be able to do it some point this morning.

Everyone is well again, finally.  And, I think we've finally found a solution for Bertram's sleeping issues.  We had to stay in his room til he fell asleep, and then he'd wake up several times in the night and either get in bed with us, or we'd have to sleep with him.  One night, I left the reading light on in his room.  (We call it the Nana light, as it used to only be in the room when my mom visited).  He slept all night.  Now we've done it for the past 4 nights, and he stays in his room all night.  I think he was waking up in the dark and feeling lost or confused.  Now when he wakes up, he sees all is well and goes back to sleep.  Hallelujah!  I got several nights of 6 hours uninterrupted sleep, it was amazing.

Bertram is doing well with school.  He plays with a couple other boys, Kunal and Mayson.  (I don't think I mentioned previously that Bertram bit Mayson.  It was a confusing situation, since the teacher didn't see it happen.  Bertram said Mayson put his finger in Bertie's mouth while he was talking.  Which sounded like a lie, but Mayson later told the teacher the same thing.  So I'm not sure.  But I made Bertram write an apology note, and I apologized to his mom.)  I made his appointment for Kindergarten registration.  :sob:  I can't believe he'll be starting real school in the fall.  The district used to do half day kindergarten, but stopped (I'd guess) because parents had issue with child care.  I'm bummed that he'll be gone all day.  Plus that seems like a long time for a kid to sit still and listen.

Bronwyn has been picking up a lot of new words lately.  She calls our cat meow-meow.  She loves the Christmas trees and lights.  I counted yesterday, and she has almost 30 words (she'll be 17 months in a few days).  I think when Bertram was 18 months he had about 80 words, so she'll be close to that, I think.  She is very dramatic, and will throw herself to the floor when she is unhappy with something.  She is getting molars.  She has been eschewing all naps lately.  She still needs them, she just refuses.  It's irritating, because then she's a grump, which in turn makes me a grump. She was doing a pattern of wake up around 7, back to sleep around 8 until 10:30 or 11.  Then nap again from 1-3ish.  Maybe she only needs one nap now. I guess I'll have to experiment with that.  She is at an age that makes it very hard for me to do things while she's awake.  She is our little octopus, hands into everything.  And she still loves to put everything in her mouth. 

Aaron is currently hating his new job.  It doesn't seem like a very defined position.  For the first couple weeks no one knew what he should be doing with his time.  Then they had him work on a project that got scrapped.  So now he's back to reading manuals and twiddling his thumbs. 

My depression game is still strong.  I think I'm going to have to switch meds again.  What I'm on might be working if I were also taking Adderall, but Bron is still nursing, so I'll have to wait.

End of July

Bertram did pretty well with his Space Camp.  I should have just told him it was preschool.  I think he was expecting a real rocket, or something.  His cousin, Kaylee, was in the class with him, which was nice.  But he had a hard time with me leaving, most days.  I found a method that worked for both of us, by the end of the week.  (I go in with him.  He says he wants to go home.  I ignore that and sit down.  After a minute or so, he gets something to play with.  Then he gets really into whatever he's doing.  I tell him "I'm going in 2 minutes."  He says ok.  Two minutes later I tell him bye, and he barely looks up).  All in all, he had fun.

I think I mentioned previously, that I signed Bertie up for free preschool.  But it was every day, and not on the best side of the city.  I found a preschool program through San Jose Parks and Rec, which was just what I wanted.  Two half days a week, close enough to walk to (1.2 miles away) and doesn't cost a fortune.  ($197 a month, which is about $100 less than any other program in the area). He starts on the 28th of August and goes til May 30.  I've got to get him excited, maybe having him choose a backpack and lunch box? 
Here is the description:
This class prepares your child for kindergarten with age-appropriate
activities, learning concepts, socialization skills and fun. Your child will gain
a basic understanding of shapes, colors and pre-phonics and literacy
building (i.e. identifying letter sounds, and writing the alphabet and simple
words), as well as number recognition, and counting up to 30. The goal is
to have fun, participate and learn. Children must be fully potty trained before the start of class. Requirements for parent attendance, volunteers, snacks, etc. varies by center.

I think some of it may be boring for him.  He knows colours, and shapes, and he reads fairly well.  But the socialization will be good, and counting.  He can get to 12, then skips a couple numbers going to 30. And phonics will be good.  He knows the letter sounds, but doesn't seem to associate them with words.  His reading is about 90% sight reading.  So it's exciting.

Bronwyn turned one last week.  She had her well check on Friday.  She is still a tiny girl 16lb12.4oz, and 28 inches tall.  I think that is 8%ile for weight, and 16%ile for height.  But she is good on all developmental issues.  She's just a tiny girl.  She has 4 teeth, and it working on a couple more.  She got three shots: MMR, Hep A and chicken pox.  She was grumpy immediately following her appointment, but was fine the rest of the day.  (Poor kid, she cried so hard).  I'm feeding her meals first, then nursing after, to see if that will help her gain a little weight. 

We had her party on Saturday.  It was low key, just family.  I had some water stuff for the older cousins (they are 4, 5, and 6) to play will.  We had Eggrolls, rice, watermelon, veggies and cake.

She liked this little splash pad.

She wasn't a fan of her smash cake.

She was very tired at the end, because she'd missed a nap.  

My mom is here (because of Bronwyn's birthday).  I love having her around.  I wish she lived closer.  But I'm glad I get to see her as much as I do (especially because 3000 miles is far away).  

The kids started swimming lessons last week.  (It's 2 weeks mon-thur). Bertie is in the tot class (Turtles) and Bron and I are in the baby class (Whales).  This is the first time Bertram has done swimming lessons without me.  He's doing very well, from what I can tell.  I watch him while I'm doing things with Brony on the otherwise of the pool.  Bronwyn is really too young for the actual instruction.  But she enjoys being in the water.  She really likes jumping in.  At the side of the pool, she climbs out.  And stands up, holding my fingers.  I help her jump in, she smiles and wants to go again and again.  I dunked her under a little bit, and it didn't bother her at all.

I bought our plane tickets to go to Virginia.  We'll be going to Myrtle Beach from there.  I'm really excited.  I love the beach, and both kids love the beach.  Aaron could take or leave the beach, but likes vacation.  It took forever to get the tickets sorted out.  We had $800 in travel certificates from United (from when Aaron chose to get bumped last year).  But I have to do Aaron's reservation separate from me and the kids because he comes back sooner.  So I had two screens going at once, so we could have seats together. But I got to the end, and it wasn't accepting the certificate (an error message kept popping up).  So I called customer service, and got Aaron's done.  I figured mine would work, but it didn't.  So I had to call back and do it again.  All in all, it took almost an hour to get it all done.

Now it's July

On Monday (almost a week ago), I had my every-couple-of-years colonoscopy.  I did the same prep that I had used previously, Miralax in Gatorade (with Duocolax and Mg Citrate).  I need to remember to start my prep a lot sooner than the paperwork says.  I started drinking the Miralax (half a bottle in 32oz of green Gatorade) around 4pm.  I didn't have any results until about 2am.  I think it's supposed to work in 2 hours.  Since it didn't start working til very early in the morning, which meant I wasn't really ready at 8:30, like I was supposed to be.  I was worried that the camera wouldn't be able to see what it needed to.  But everything was fine.  There wasn't anything worrisome.  My GI did take some biopsies, so we'll see if there is anything wrong when they come back from pathology.

Bertie wants someone to hangout with him til he falls asleep.  So bedtime is often a battle (which I think is fairly common).  After telling him to go to bed about 15 times tonight, he came back out and said "will you snuggle with me?"  (Snuggle sounds more like nuddle).  I told him no and to go back to bed.  Then I felt terrible, and went in to lay down with him for a few minutes.  I asked him how he was feeling lately.  He said good.  I said it seems like you've been sad or angry a lot lately.  He responded I want you to do things with me, but you won't do them.  Ouch.  I suck.  I thought I said yes to him a good amount of time, but apparently not often enough. 

This is one of the major things giving me pause about having a third baby.  I have enough love for everyone.  But I don't know that I can give everyone the time and attention they need and deserve. 

And on the same page- I'm having second thoughts about Bertram going to preschool next year.  I really don't want him gone everyday.  He'll be doing that soon enough with kindergarten.  (Plus he's good on academics, it's mostly for social skills, classroom skills etc).

Aaron and I have been doing 16:8 intermittent fasting.  We (generally) eat between the hours of 10am-6pm.  Then nothing with calories the rest of the time.  It's supposed to be fairly effective for weight loss, and it's easy to do.  It hasn't been hard (other than the first couple evenings, because I'm used to snacking at night).  Aaron has been really good about sticking to it, and has lose 6-7 lbs in about 2 weeks.  I've not been as good.  A couple nights I was really hungry.  With the colonoscopy prep, I had to eat all day.  So I'll do better this week and hopefully this week, and the scale will reflect it.  I've lost a couple lbs so far.  I've been in a little funk, so my exercise hasn't been up to par either.

In the next couple weeks Bertram has space camp (starting tomorrow), both kids have swimming lessons, my mom is coming out, we're having Bronwyn's birthday (how is she almost 1?), Bertram has a PT appt, and I have another dental visit.  So we'll be busy. 

Somehow it's May

We went to the low cost preschool thing.  I have a few reservations.  I was really hoping to have him do 2-3 days a week.  But the only options were full days or part days Monday-Friday.  He's currently signed up for 12:30-3:30 M-F.  The other issue is that he can only have 10 absences for the whole school year.  We already have a week-long trip planned for September, and I was going to stay a little longer than that with the kids.  A couple other issues I have is that the preschool is in a not great area, and I'm anxious about letting him go to strangers.  I know that is somewhat silly, since he will have to go to school at some point, but I am a nervous person.  We're going to go and tour it in July, and see what kind of vibe we get.  If I don't feel good about it, then we will withdraw him.

My sister Jessica is visiting, so we've gone on a few day trips with her and my dad: Monterey Bay Aquarium, Golden Gate Park (twice), Santa Cruz and the Oakland Zoo.  On the trip to Monterey I left Bertram's tablet on the roof of the car.  We retraced our drive when we got home, and there were no signs of it (smooshed or otherwise).  I was so aggravated that I'd done that.  My mom was nice enough to order him a new one.

I went to the dentist a few days ago.  I needed a crown and filling.  But when the dentist looked at the tooth needing the crown, he saw it needed a root canal (then a crown).  I wasn't too concerned, I had a root canal last year (at the endodontist), I had no pain and he did a great job.  This time, I had a lot of pain.  I had 2 or 3 doses of Novocaine before he even started.  Every time he started working it hurt.  I started crying after a bit, because it hurt, and I just couldn't get numb.  The dentist said there was a nuclear numbing option, where I would definitely get numb, or he could give me some antibiotics and we can do it all again in 2 weeks.  I thought about just trying to press through, but I was so stressed I said let's wait.  It was a rough day.  

I've been thinking about a 3rd (last) baby.  We're both unsure.  I would love to have another but a few things are giving me pause.  I don't want Bronwyn to become the middle child (as it sucks).  The kids will have to share a room.  We'll have to get a minivan (or suv).  (Though, we'll likely have to do that anyway.  So we have room to drive the kids, their friends, our family, etc).  Cost of everything (except insurance) will go up.  Plus I was really anxious during my pregnancy with Bron.  We have some time to figure it out, but not too long, I'm going to be 35 with year.

The kids are doing well.  Bertram is reading a lot.  We going to the library every week or so. He's been very into Planet Putty and Galaxy Goo lately.  They are just slime, in different colours.  But it's space related, so he gets very excited.  We have all the planet putty, but only 2 galaxy goo so far.  He loves art projects, especially painting.  He's been practicing using scissors.  I've been giving him a few chores.  He is so good with Bronwyn, and she just loves him.
Bronwyn is army crawling everywhere.  She's starting to pull up a little, and wave.  She may say "more" but I'm not sure yet.  She loves most food, she is still a good nurser. 

There is probably something else I'm forgetting, but that's all I have for now.