She is here!

At 39 weeks and 2 days Bronwyn Alice came charging into the world.

The whole pregnancy, I had assumed she would be early.  Bertram was nearly a month early.  I heard that second babies often come earlier than the first.  So I waited and waited.  I had some random contractions/ Braxton-Hicks for the last three weeks.  I kept watching to the mucus plug, a bloody show, anything that would tell me the time was near, but nothing happened.

So, since she wasn't going to be early, I started counting down til my mom arrived.  I really wanted her to be there, especially since Aaron really isn't comfortable around blood, and my mom worked as a nurse for 35+ years.  So last night around 9, my mom arrived.

I woke up around 2 or 2:30 this morning, from a contraction.  Not a very strong, or painful one,   So I laid around for a while, and had a few more.  Aaron woke up and suggested I time them, which didn't occur to me, for some reason.  I think because they seemed irregular.  After an hour of timing, they were 4 minutes apart, lasting a minute each.  (In the birthing class, the teacher said for second babies follow 7-1-1 (7 minutes apart, lasting one minute, for at least an hour)).  I called L&D, they asked how I was feeling.  I said the contractions weren't too bad.  The said to drink 2 big glasses of water and take an hour-long shower, then lay down.  I drank, and lasted 40 minutes in the shower, and then laid down.  It was probably almost 6 at this point, and the contractions were getting worse.  Aaron said, we'll we probably need to get ready to go.  Mom asked if she had time to shower.  I said sure, it seemed like there was a lot of time still.  Aaron's folks came over to stay with Bertie at 6:45, and we took off for Kaiser.

The contractions were getting worse.  We got to Kaiser a little before 7.  Aaron dropped off my mom and me and went to park.  We walked in, and then I was on the floor on all fours in front of the elevator.  An orderly asked if I needed a wheelchair, I said no.  Then he asked again, and I said "well, I won't be a hero."  I got wheeled up for floor 5, crying and grunting the whole way.

We got to the desk, and the nurse said "what can we do for you today?"  I said "I'm having a baby."

I got a room, got changed, was feeling "pushy".  The midwife came in, and checked me.  I was expecting to be a 5 or 6.  Then she said the words that filled me with dread: "Alright, you're dialated to 9cm! So you can start pushing when you're ready."  I said "but can I still have an epidural?"  (I already knew the answer, but I asked anyway).  She said it was too late, that if she broke my water, baby would come quickly.  I was in a lot of pain.  So I asked for NO2, as it was supposed to help.  (Spoiler alert: it didn't).  I used it some, but gave up quickly, because I couldn't feel a difference.  I also was worried about GBS, since i was positive,  I knew I needed the antibiotics.  They hooked it up, but I didn't get much before everything was over with.

I was writhing around on the bed, crying, groaning, and making all sorts of embarrassing sounds.  Then my water broke.  But not just broke, like exploded across the room, all over the midwife, and the other nurse.  I was also so sweaty.  The iv tape wouldn't stick to my skin.

I was still screaming, crying and groaning (and probably other sounds).  The nurses and Dr (who came in after I drenched the midwife), took the bed apart, and had me curl up to push.  To be honest, it was terrible, and I wouldn't recommend it.  Epidurals are so nice.  And I will be the first to admit I am no badass.  It felt like I was pushing for a long time.  It was probably 10-15 minutes total, maybe less.  At one point the Dr said the head was halfway out, and I think I said "pull her out!", which of course, didn't happen.  My legs wouldn't stop trembling, which meant, I couldn't curl up to push very well.  I know I said at least once that I couldn't do it (which is something I swore I'd never say while giving birth). Her head came out, so I assumed the pain was done (since that's presumably the hardest part). But the rest hurt too.  Also, I had my eyes close almost the whole time, not sure why).

At 7:35am Bronwyn was here.  6lbs12oz, 18 inches long.  Fairly small, but almost 1.5 lbs more than Bertie.  She was waxy, and not crying too much, and didn't have a cone-head.

The placenta hurt some too.  I had a 2nd degree tear, and I may have gotten cut before hand, I'm not sure.  The stitching hurt, I got a lot of lidocane, and an injection of Fentanyl.  But it hurt.  And baby was over having her weight, and getting checked out (there was some slight mecronium staining.

Then I got her back, and she immediately started rooting, and latched quickly and well.

My dad, Aaron's folks and Bertram came to met her.

Bronwyn ordered a MatchBox car garage for Bertie.  He was really thrilled.  And he was excited to hold her.

She had and passed her hearing test.

All in all, a pretty good day.  She's nursed a bunch, has pooped 3 times and peed twice.  And, unless something odd comes up, we'll be going home tomorrow.

I'm still in a decent amount of pain, but it's not bad, considering that all I've had is Tylenol and Motrin.

Quick baby update

Yesterday was my 38 week appointment.  Bertie came with me.  The NP always lets him help, which is really nice.  So he helped with the doppler.  Heart sounds good, she's still head down.I asked for an internal, since I'd have a few random contractions.  I was hoping for a little progress.  But there really wasn't any.  No dilation or effacement, only signs are that the cervix is soft, and baby has dropped a little.  I'm getting fairly uncomfortable, so I'm ready when she is.  Also, the NP said if I make if to my 40 week appointment, we can schedule an induction for 41 weeks.  So there is an end in sight, but it's dragging along.

I think I'm going to get Bertram a gift to open when baby sister is born, and tell him it's from her.  Maybe a hot wheels track.

Also, Aaron started his new job yesterday.  He's still with the Social Services for the county, but he's a supervisor now.  He says his office is really hot.  But other than that things seem pretty good.  He got to work in 12 minutes yesterday.  That is a dream commute around here where people often spend an hour+ going to work.

How far along? 38 weeks 
Total weight loss/gain: About 23lbs.  I would have liked to kept it under 20, but I'm happy with 23, especially since I gained 40 with Bertie.

Maternity clothes? I'm currently wearing 0 maternity clothes, but I was doing yard work.  Men's basketball shorts, and a very big t-shirt.  Other than this it's all maternity clothes
Sleep: Not too bad.  I remember not being able to get comfortable when I was pregnant the first time.  I can get comfortable, but I sometimes have trouble falling asleep.

Best moment this week: Lots of baby kicks and squiggles

Movement: She moves a lot, especially after I eat

Food cravings: Not too much.  Kool-aid, surprisingly.  I haven't been too hungry, and most food doesn't sound good.
Food aversions: Garlic, onions, and sometimes raw veg
Gender: Girl
Labor Signs: Nothing much. Braxton-hicks occasionally

Belly Button in or out? In, it's not going anywhere
What I miss: Sleeping on my back.

What I am looking forward to: Getting her room completely done.  I'm waiting on a couple framed things from Target.  (I ordered them before, and they arrived smashed. I reordered and am crossing my fingers.  I'm just waiting on the wall stuff, the bassinet, crib, clothes, changing table, etc are ready.  I'd probably ought to get out the breast pump, and make sure it's ready too.
Milestones: 38 weeks!  Bertram was a week and a half old at this point!

Somehow it's been a month since I blogged.  I suck.  

Let's see what I can remember.

Our 12th anniversary came and went without fanfare.  Between being 8 months pregnant, having a 3 year old and being poor, we didn't end up doing anything.  I think sometime after baby is born we'll have a do-over.  We had dinner at Chick-fil-a.  Haha.

Last week my FiLs truck was stolen from in front of their house.  It was his work truck, so all his tools were in it.  We assumed we'd never see it again, or if we did, it wouldn't be driveable.  Bertie and I came back from running errands today, and there it was, back in front of the house.  Nothing was missing, nothing was broken.  And, the weirdest thing, it was found one street over.  So that had a happy ending.  The police guessed maybe some kids wanted to go joy-riding, found they could, got scared, and left it.

Last week Aaron's co-workers threw us a baby shower.

It was really nice, and kind of fancy.  We got a lot of diapers, and clothes.  I'm making Aaron write all the thank you notes (since I did all of them from my shower).

Baby is measuring right on track.  I've had some braxton-hicks, but nothing "real" yet.  I had my GBS test last week.  I'm positive.  Lame, but no big deal.  We have her room mostly ready, I need to put a few more things away, and hang up the wall decorations.

Aaron got a promotion at work!  He was an EW2, now he'll be a supervisor.  Usually, one has to be an EW3 first, but they liked him, so he gets to skip a step (which is really rare).  So he'll make a good deal more money, and have a better commute.  (I should mention that his commute was good before, about 30 minutes, which is practically unheard of around here, but his new one will be 15-20 minutes).  So that's really exciting.  His supervisor pay starts today, but he doesn't actually start the job til next week.

Today Fiona has a seizure.  This happens once or twice a year.  Generally it's not a big deal (as in the vet can't do much).  But she was kind of running as she was seizing, and smacked her head into the bed frame.  I picked her up, and she had cut her forehead open.  I took her to the vet (which was fortunately open).  They kept her for four hours.  Gave her drugs to stop the seizure, and she got iv fluids.  They glued her head back together, no stitches.  They drew blood, but we won't have the results til Wednesday.  I was talking to one of the vet techs about fireworks, and mentioned we'd given Yoie her anti-anxiety medication last night.  The tech said that that medication can cause seizures in dogs that are already prone to seizures.  That was good to know.  She's currently still a little dopped up, so the few fireworks going off haven't bothered her.  We'll see how tomorrow night goes.  (Note: we have a thunder shirt for her, but putting it on her, makes her nervous.).

How far along? 37 weeks 
Total weight loss/gain: About 20lbs

Maternity clothes? Yes, please.  I've been searching for a couple more nursing tops.
Sleep: Surprisingly, no real issues, except some insomnia.  Once I'm asleep, I'm usually good.

Best moment this week: Baby shower with Aaron's co-workers

Movement: She loves to dance

Food cravings: Otter pops, watermelon
Food aversions: Garlic, onions, and sometimes raw veg
Gender: Girl
Labor Signs: Some braxton-hicks, off and on. (By this time, Bertie was already born.)

Belly Button in or out? In, it's not going anywhere
What I miss: Sleeping on my back.

What I am looking forward to:  Meeting my girl
Milestones: We made it to full term!

I keep meaning to post more often, then I don't.  Then I forget what I was going to say.

Today was the last day of Joy School and the last swimming lesson.  I'm a little sad for them both to end, but it's also nice not to have weekly obligations.  He did pretty well towards the end of Joy School, but it took a while to get there.  I'd love to have him do preschool in the fall.  I think it would be good for him, and it would give me a little more one on one time with baby.  But the cheapest I've been able to find is about $200 a month (for 2 days a week).  And I'm not sure we could easily afford it. We aren't low income enough for funding, but we can't afford it on our own either.  I guess we'll see what happens.  Aaron has applied for a couple of new positions, and his yearly raise is coming up.  But I doubt preschool is in the cards.
Swimming was fun though.  He's getting a lot more comfortable in the water.  And he really enjoys it.  Hopefully I'll be able to take him a few more times before baby comes.  Next year he'll be big enough to take lessons on his own, and I'll take mommy/baby lessons with baby girl.

I'm in my 33rd week of pregnancy.  It seems like I'm quickly running out of time.  And yet, I still can't imagine the next step: having a daughter, being a mom to two.  Is that weird?  I'm sure I'll be attached when she's born, but... I'm not sure how to explain it.  She feels foreign, even though she's here.  Anyway, thus far everything is still looking good.  I had my 32 week with an MD (as opposed to a nurse midwife, which I usually see).  I talked to her about a VBAC.  She said the odds (according to some algorithm) are only 46% in my favour, for a successful VBAC.  I've been going back and forth about whether to try the VBAC or schedule a c-section straight away.  My objection to trying was pain of labouring, and being super tired and then need a c-section anyway.  Or worse, needing an emergency c-section like last time, and missing the whole thing.  Plus I'd love to have the golden hour.  I think, in the end, if I didn't at least try a VBAC I would always wonder if it could have happened.  But we'll see what the 36 week appointment looks like.  If she's breech, for example, I'll schedule the c-section.  So really, it's up in the air, but I'm going to try a VBAC if possible.
I've been feeling crummy off and on.  My anxiety has been very high.  I had an anxiety attack at church a couple weeks ago, for no reason.  (The same thing happened when I was pregnant with Bertie).  I've been really tired, and my hips and back hurt off and on.  And I've been having really bad indigestion.  So bad that something like room temperature water would both me.  My mom ordered me a couple cases of Boost with extra protein, so I have something somewhat healthy on those bad days (instead of nothing, or toast).  My birthday was really bad, I had the indigestion, and nausea and sweats; it was like the first trimester all over again.  I had to take a promethizine, then I was able to eat and drink normally.  The day after that I ate everything,  It was the first time in a while I'd actually felt hungry, so I ate.  Then today I was up 5 lbs.  How is that even possible?  I don't have any other preclampsia symptoms, so it's not likely that.  I'm hoping it's water weight.  I've been eating more normally today.

How far along? 33 weeks 3 days
Total weight loss/gain: About 16 lbs, before the mysterious weight gain.

Maternity clothes? All.  With the exception of mens basketball shorts, and a couple pairs of leggings.
Sleep: Not too many issues sleeping.  I wake up a lot to pee (every 2 hours), but I can usually go back to sleep.

Best moment this week: Getting the nursery in order.

Movement: Mostly evening, but also afternoons.

Food cravings: Turkey and cheese sandwich from Togos, or salad with blue cheese dressing. So, stuff I can't eat.
Food aversions: Garlic, onions, and sometimes raw veg
Gender: Girl,
Labor Signs: None, thank goodness, not even braxton hicks.

Belly Button in or out? In, it's not going anywhere
What I miss: Moving freely

What I am looking forward to:  Less back pain
Milestones: Another viability milestone is a couple weeks away.

Another catch up.

I feel like I have a lot and nothing to say, all at once.

Pregnancy has been going fine.  Baby is pretty active.  I'm 30+1 today.  I feel like I'm getting into the peeing all the time phase.  Also, I'm having more hip issues this time, my pelvis feels creaky at times. Her room is coming together.  We need to move a bookshelf and desk out (though, I'm not sure where the desk is going yet).  And the dresser needs to be cleared out.  So, probably about a day's work.  I need to get the baby carseat out, and resize it for a newborn. We have a late pregnancy class tomorrow night, I think that's the last class I'm signed up for.  And in a couple weeks, I need to take in my pre-admissions paperwork.  It seems odd that somewhere in the next 6-10 weeks we'll become a family of four.  (Ideally closer to 10 weeks, but B was 4 weeks early, so I won't rule it out).  I still look at viability info, in case she comes early.

My older sister has come to visit, which means we're in a period of a lot of day trips.  So far we've been to Happy Hollow, and the SF Zoo.  We're going to the Monterey Aquarium tomorrow, and at some point SF again, and probably Monterey again to see the tide pools (we were going to do that tomorrow, but it's going to be very cold (a high of 58), so I think it'll be postponed).  It's been a lot of fun so far.

Since I'm not on a trip today I need to get the house cleaned up.  Normal stuff and laundry.

My allergies are still terrible.

Rough Day

Much of today was difficult.

I woke up at 4:45, and went to the track at 5:50ish.  I walked, and listened to the radio, me time.  I came home a little before 7.  Bertram was awake, so he and I ate breakfast, and he watched one cartoon.

Then I told him we were going on an adventure.  The county parks department puts on this sort of photo scavenger hunt for the summer.  I thought he and I could give it a try, especially since I want him to spend more time outside.  It was going to be pretty warm, so we headed out early, and went to Quicksilver Park.  He seemed amenable, until we set foot on the trail. Then he whined almost the whole way.  He wanted to go home.  He didn't like it.  He was too tired.  We did take some pictures.  But I practically had to drag him.  And, I actually ended up carrying him on my shoulders.  It wasn't very long, maybe .8 miles, nor was it very hilly, but he had a terrible time. So, I didn't have a great time.

On the way home he whined more.  When we got back, I sent him down the street to grandma and grandpa's house.  I cleaned the kitchen, and folded some laundry.  Then showered, and went to get him.  Somewhere around that point he said "oh damn it" for the third time that day and lost all his screen time for the rest of the day.  Then he turned on all the lights, and refused to turn them off, so I sent him to his bed.

We had the sibling class in the afternoon, across town.  So we went in that direction earlier in the afternoon to avoid fighting traffic to get there.  We went to the mall, he wanted to ride in the stroller, which was fine with me.  He didn't do too bad at the mall, I just had used up all my patience that morning.

He had been talking excitedly about the big brother class for almost a week.  When I told him it was time to go there, he started whining again.  He was tired, he wanted to go home, etc.

We drove to the Santa Clara Kaiser, and found parking without too much trouble.  He whined most of the way to the class room about not wanting to be there.

When were we in the class, he was the nightmare kid.  Wouldn't be quiet, wouldn't answer when he was spoken to, didn't follow directions well, didn't participate.  I was very close to walking out the door and talking him home.  But we stuck it out.  (After the class he didn't want to go home, but "somewhere else").

The drive home was awful.  I have no clue how people commute.  The hospital is 9 miles from our house.  It took us an hour to get home.  An hour.  I gave him a bag of Goldfish to snack on.  He dumped most of them into him lap.  We stopped at Maccas to get lemonade (hot day, I'd drank all my water, I needed something cold, and I was cranky).  I got him a small, he drank it as we drove.  Until we were about two minutes from the house, when he decided it would be better to (purposefully) trip the drink upside-down, all over the car's seat.  At that point I lost it.  I kept asking him why he did that.  And then I was crying.  We pulled in, and he went directly to time out.  Aaron cleaned out the car as best he could.  Then while he was in time out, he said oh damn it again, so I sent him to his room again.

I've been dismissing his behaviour, because he's 3, he's tired, he doesn't feel well, whatever.  But Aaron pointed out: how often is he the worst kid in the class? The answer is most of the time.  So I'm at a bit of a loss.  I felt like we'd been disciplining him adequately, but he's just been really defiant.  We'll tell him not to do something, he'll look right at us and do it.  There is an immediate consequence, but it doesn't seem to matter.  There is another class called Parenting the Spirited Child (or something like that), so we'll sign up for that, and hope to get some direction.

Overdue blog

I've been telling myself I should blog for at least 2 weeks, maybe more.  Yet time slips by, as it always does.
I am almost 28 weeks/7 months/ in the third trimester.  The pregnancy has simultaneously felt like it's gone quickly and lasted forever.  Little girl is moving quite a bit.  My indigestion has been really bad at night.  Just lots of burping.
Next week will be busy.  We have our 28 week appt, Bertie's sibling class, the birthing class, a hair appt and the normal stuff, joy school and soccer.
Bertie started soccer last week, it went ok.  I signed him up as 'daddy and me' so he and Aaron could do something together (because Bertie and I always do stuff together).  It's mostly controlled chaos of 20 little kids+parents.  At the end of May Bertram and I will be doing swimming lessons again.  He's old enough for the non-parent class, but he's not tall enough.  Which is fine, I like doing the classes with him, and I have a maternity bathing suit.  Plus I'm trying to soak up as much one-on-one time as I can.
We moved Bertram into a big boy bed a couple weeks ago.  It went much smoother than expected.  We got my old bunk bed from dad's house.  My thinking was two beds for the space of one.  So far he's slept on the bottom bunk, and just climbs up and down for fun.  I'm hoping to get him to sleep on the top bunk, so when my mom comes, she can have the bottom bunk.
I got Bertie's hair cut yesterday.  It is WAY too short.  It's like a regular little boy haircut, no more long beautiful curls.  I actually cried the whole way home. Then I felt worse because he told me he didn't like it.  I told him I didn't either, but it would grow back.

How far along? 27 weeks 4 days
Total weight loss/gain: Somewhere in the neighbourhood of 10-12 lbs.  I haven't been eating as carefully as I should.

Maternity clothes? All.  With the exception of mens basketball shorts, and a couple pairs of leggings.
Sleep: I'm tired all day.  Then either can't get to sleep at night, or wake to pee, and can't go back to sleep.

Best moment this week: Feeling her kick.

Movement: Quite a lot in the evenings.

Food cravings: Most food.  I really want lunch meat sandwiches, but can't eat them.  Stupid listeria.
Food aversions: Garlic.
Gender: Girl, as far as we know.
Labor Signs: None, thank goodness.

Belly Button in or out? In.  I think I have a perpetual innie.
What I miss: Sleeping on my back, deli sandwiches, real medications.

What I am looking forward to:  Setting up little girl's room.  Attending the birthing class.
Milestones: We've reached the 2nd viability milestone.  Yay!